Dear e,
I just transferred here and I know it’s only about the second week of
school, but it’s kind of hard to meet people. I’ve talked to a lot of people,
but that’s it. I never really hang out with anyone and it seems like everyone
has already made friends with everyone else (if that makes any sense).
I don’t know if I’m just socially retarded or what. Help me out and shed
some light on my dilemma.
Lonely Body
Dear Lonely,
First off, I don’t think you’re socially retarded; I know what you’re going
through. I switched majors after my first year here and, even though I
knew people in my new classes, cliques had already been formed and
they were, and still are, impenetrable.
The best advice I can give you is not to wait for people to invite you out.
Invite them out first. A lot of times people will wait for someone else to
make the first move, and, unless you become that someone else, you could
risk it not happening at all. It may take a few tries of asking but someone
will say “yes” eventually, so don’t be discouraged.
Make it something easy at first: “Where are you headed? Want to grab
lunch?” Or, make it school-related: Do homework together, start a study
group, or, if you can, work in a pair for a project.
Maybe even try joining a club or intramural sport. That way, you automatically
know that you have something in common with everyone in
the room.
Always say “Hello” outside of class and stop to talk if you can; It shows
you’re friendly and open. Add some classmates on Facebook (if you have
one) and initiate contact that way. Just relax and be you. People will
open up more as they get comfortable with their schedules and whatnot.
Just give it time.
You don’t mention a roommate, but if you have one, try going out
with them. Also check out the RITreat area in the SAU, room 1100.
It’s behind the all glass wall across from the cafeteria; you can’t miss it. OCASA
(Off-Campus & Apartment Student Association) is holding a transfer student
coffee break on September 25 from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. where you can
go and meet other transfer students who may very well be in the same
situation as you.
Hope this helps!
e.
Dear e,
A couple of weeks ago, I met this girl during Orientation, and we really
hit it off. Everything is going really well relationship-wise. The problem is
that I’m living in a quintuplet, and she has the creepiest, most immature
roommate. There’s no way to get alone time in my room, obviously. And if
we go to her room, the roommate is always looming over us, making snide
comments and bringing weird people over. Which brings me to my question:
Where else can we go on this campus for some privacy? All I want is
to do is make out with this girl, and RIT seems to be thwarting me at every
turn. Even if it’s only for 15 minutes, that’s better than the nothing I’m
getting now. Got any tips?
In Need of a Special Place
Dear In Need,
If a special place is what you’re looking for I’ve got a few ideas.
I’ve heard some rumors about the greenhouse that’s attached to Building
8 on the A level. Apparently it’s a good hook up spot. Another suggestion
would be take her on a picnic. RIT has plenty of open green grass for you
to pull out a blanket, have a romantic meal or snack, and of course that
make out session you’ve been waiting for. I wouldn’t get too frisky in the
open, though. And, even though it’s not very romantic, look in the tunnels
for low traffic areas or a little nook of space to get some time alone
for a few minutes.
If her roommate doesn’t have a boyfriend, find her one! Even if you can’t,
pay one of your friends, with either gratitude or cash (though the latter
isn’t very morally sound) to take her out in order to buy you some time.
They could end up hitting it off!
One last suggestion I have is to turn her bed (since she only has one roommate)
into a hide away via a make-shift canopy with the extra railings
that each dorm bunk bed comes with. If nothing else, you’ll know for
sure if her roommate is the “creepiest” when she peeks in to see what’s
going on!
Good luck!
e.
