Amber Gartung

REPORTER RECOMMENDS

I know this is a tech school, and I know that most of us have jobs and majors that revolve around using some sort technology, but I’ve been staring at this laptop screen for a ridiculous amount of time and I’m pretty sure I’m hallucinating. And if I’m not, I’m going to have to get an exterminator to take care of the rainbow colored fairies hanging out in the corner of my left eye. They’re distracting.

The way that we experience the world through technology can take away from the way we interact with the world in front of us, or in most cases behind us. This isn’t a new concept, but I think it’s an important one that often gets lost. So this week, try something simple that takes you completely off the grid and lets you get in touch with your mind and body. Climb a tree, look at the moon, or just sit in silence for a spell. Do anything that allows you to slow down and forget about the flashing lights and loud sounds of the 21st century. Spend some time with your thoughts and sensations and remember how good it can feel just to feel.

STREAM OF FACTS

On August 30, a 21-foot saltwater crocodile was captured alive in the village of Banuwan in the southern Philippines. The reptile weighed in at 2,370 pounds and is the largest crocodile ever held in captivity. The impoverished villagers voted to build a nature park to display the animal. The BEAST is just nine feet shorter than the fictional man-eating croc in the film “Lake Placid.”

BEAST is the codename for Dr. Henry Phillip “Hank” McCoy, from the X-Men comic book franchise. He first appeared in X-Men #1, released in 1963. Before he transformed into the furry form that most associate with his character, his appearance was relatively normal, except for his unusually large hands and feet, which drew RIDICULE from the other children in school.

The word RIDICULE comes from the Latin word “ridiculum”, which means “to jest.” Ridiculum is also the name of a punk band from Connecticut. They are signed to NOXIOUS Records.

Volcanologists are considered to have one to the dirtiest and most dangerous jobs on the planet. They are constantly exposed to NOXIOUS gasses, ash, extreme heat and dangerous environments. The job of a volcanologist is to study the patterns of active and dormant volcanoes, a task that necessitates at least a decade of training and requires lots of time spent in dangerously VOLATILE situations.

Onion prices are seven times more VOLATILE than oil prices. Because of these extreme fluctuations, onions are the only commodities where futures trading is banned. In 1958, onion growers believed that trading stocks based on speculation was hurting their business, so they petitioned then Michigan Congressman Gerald Ford to pass the ban. It still stands to this day.

WORD OF THE WEEK

Necrographer adj. — Someone who writes obituaries.

Ben was less than thrilled that the best job he could get with his English degree was as a necographer, writing obituaries in his hometown.

QUOTE

“Because there’s no such thing as rock stars, there’s just people who play music. And some of them are just like us, some of them are dicks.”

OVERSEEN AND OVERHEARD

“Boxers and pockets are not mutually exclusive concepts.”

- Male student in UC suite

“Give me half an erection so I can put out this fire.”

- Male student to female student in the woods.