How Crazy is Your Roommate?

Fri, 10 Sep 2010 00:00:00 -0400

Wear a hazmat suit.

by Emily Bogle

Whether you’ve just moved into the dorms or you’re living in a house off-campus with friends, you are likely to run into unsavory living situations. When arriving at college, some kids go crazy with independence. Others, fearful of meeting new people, stay locked up in their rooms. While everyone has their quirks, living with someone else can be much more than you bargained for. Test your roommate against this quiz and see how he or she stacks up against the worst.

Most nights before a big test, your roommate:

A Is studying quietly, reviewing flash cards, and making a study sheet.
B Is sleeping.
C Is yelling to friends on “World of Warcraft” during
a midnight raid.
D Is out partying.

Your roommate’s standard of cleanliness:

A Is very high. They always pick up after themselves and occasionally do your dishes, too.
B Is moderate. They keep their mess on their side of the room, but it often seems to end up all over the place.
C Is fairly low. Cheese doodles are everywhere. The bathroom is coated with orange dust, and there are flies swarming by their desk.
D Is extremely low. The entire space smells like bong water since they’ve probably knocked it over while tripping on cases of Keystone Light.

You try to set up ground rules for your space. Your roommate responds:

A Very positively. They want to observe study hours but are willing to have a few people over for dinner or a movie night.
B By grunting and rolling over to sleep more.
C Somewhat positively. They tell you that weekly D&D nights are going to be held at your place. They even offer to save you a spot.
D Negatively. The first rule is: There are no rules.

Your roommate decorates their space with:

A A few photos of family, friends and pets. There is also a calendar of when projects are due.
BAbsolutely nothing. There are still pieces of tape from the previous tenant’s posters that haven’t been taken down.
C Wall scrolls of their favorite animes.
D Bottles of alcohol stolen from parties.

Before you leave to go home for the weekend:

A You tell your roommate and they offer to water the plant in your room.
B You leave a note on your roommate’s bedpost, where you know they’ll see it. You know that they won’t notice that you’re gone.
C You try to tell them, but their metal music is too loud. You attempt to write a letter, but they tell you they’re only reading in Japanese now.
D You don’t say anything because, if you did, you’re certain that they’d throw a party in your apartment and everything would be trashed. You take all of your valuables with you.

If you answered mostly:

A: What are you complaining about? These roommates are few and far between. Even if they have small quirks, I bet they would make you dinner and would always keep the music volume at a tolerable level.

B: Living with this type of roommate isn’t the best. It is like living with a cat that you never see but you know is lying about somewhere. You may have to shake the food bowl once a week, but they’re otherwise low maintenance.

C: Anime kids and gamers can be tough. Cases of Mountain Dew, screaming matches against computer games, Japanese cartoons constantly playing, and questionable critters lurking in your apartment aren’t great. Positives are: Maybe you’ll learn a new language, and there will always be someone more awkward than you.

D: Bring a hazmat suit. Move out or ask for a housing reassignment. Or you can hope they’ll move in with a significant other or stay permanently at that party house that was shut down for health code violations. Good luck, and invest in serious cleaners to try and maintain your space.


Joanna Eberts

Reporter Online | Tag: Crazy